Thursday, November 27, 2014

Muslim Brother Erdogan reaches new low , digs

I had a comment disabled at the Houston Chronicle website yesterday . I thought it worth saving for our readers overseas who might miss another PDUS bitch slap at er , Erdogan .  He made the news yesterday by noting that men and women are not equals as women are designed to produce and nourish the young .
Don't Pull my String !
Admittedly there is no higher calling than Motherhood . We miss our Mom , but would never wrap her in Ninja gear , invisible to the whole Civil World and in no way even part of it .  But then she wasn't programming us to be little shaheeds . ( Just like it sounds , shitheels ) .
There is islam's , and Erdogan's dirty little secret , freshly escaped . They don't believe in Civil Rights . Erdogan wants you Grrls to cover . Last week we had a column called an Immodest Prep-posal advocating near nudity for Iranian women . They would do this in protest over mullahs and muttawa ( religious Policemen ) proclaiming ' Bad Hijab ' . ( This can get you a Super Soak of Sulfuric Acid in more Religious  districts ) . Our Immodest Proposal was last weeks most read piece , popular w the Ferners mostly . It wasn't that great of a column , but who am I to complain over readership ? If I feel enough guilt over the quality I can always add improvements .
I seldom do that . I will correct glaring grammatical errors if spotted , like I should have done while typing .  We don't get many Iranian readers but something inspired a young Iranian last week to Dance on the Subway w uncovered hair .

Its a local hit on their social media for the near nudity no doubt .
The Chron article was about an abattoir . A  halal butchery .  They slaughter Goats and Chickens for local immigrant families and ethnic Grocers . This butchery is done by cutting throats as is so popular w all those Middle Eastern Unaligned Militias ( who all align towards Mecca at Sunset ) . Their  Barbarians have recently beheaded some children of , unfortunately , the wrong sect . They were singing the ' Alluah Ahkbar ' song there too . American immigrants should be advised against that public invocation . Citizens may unfairly suspect that islamic killing is about to take place and react appropriately . Todd Beamer style .
This Butcher had 500 Gallons of blood in his ditches where apparently he had disposed of it . No doubt that's how they do it back home in Halamistan .
Ok , I bet your tired of waiting for that Erdogan B slap we promised in the first paragraph . I cannot paste it until new readers are informed of the Caliph in Waiting's singular honor . Regular readers may skip to the next paragraph while I tell how Erdogan insisted that Ottomen killing 1.5 M Armenians could in no way be considered a Genocide . This blatant lie , when coupled w his insistence that the IDF killing 10 Gaza Rocketeers DID constitute a Genocide caught the ear of the World Record folks at Guinness who pronounced him the presiding ' Double Standard Bearer ' .

Ok , here is our deleted response...........

Halal ?

Do they behead Turkeys there to the tune of that muslim yodel ,
as is Halal ?

If so I 'll take 100 lbs of that Turkey Erdogan , and feed it to my dogs .

I would too , even if I had to buy some dogs first ,
just for the duty of producing er , Erdogan dooty .

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Wadda Catch , also , Free International exposure

Dunno if you guys saw the remarkable catch on Sunday Night Football . Odell Beckham made a catch that went viral on the web for a reason . It was simply an astounding catch , done w 2 fingers and a thumb .  This is how Ace described it . "....he was fouled on this play, and drew the flag. I celebrated that. I had no idea he caught the ball. I was happy with the flag. . I didn't imagine it was possible to catch the ball -- it was thrown out of reach, and the Cowbow DB is clearly pulling down on him. It took me ten seconds to realize he'd f***ing caught the thing. And not even sloppily. No ball movement here. He just catches it. Somehow. " The picture does not do justice to the catch . The ball was behind his head . His back was arched in full extension , maybe even more . He needed that last quarter inch of extension to even touch the ball . That he caught it was unbelievable , impossible , and incredible . ( Yet still the Giants lost , Again ) .

There was another remarkable catch locally last week as rescue arrangers pulled a 700 lb lost Manatee from Trinity Bay . It was distressed by the cold water which was about 54 or ten degrees too cool .  Seems like a few years ago Boston Harbor had a visiting Manatee  that got celebrity treatment , and a flight home in some stars Gulfsteam 5 . That $20 M mini -jet was rumored destroyed w projectile vomiting and explosive Diarrhea from the Huge Manatee who was not accustomed to Watercress sandwiches and Evian .
Oh, the Huge Manatee ,

Moving on........

Twenty years ago some fraternity at Harvard I think , got in trouble having a bit of boyish fun on their sidewalk . Lawn chairs were set up near foot traffic w the intent of evaluating passers-by .

Scorecards would flash , grading mating potential as if Olympic Diving were underway . This may have been back after that Blake Edward's movie ' 10 ' . Bo Derrick . Dudley Moore . Way back then .
Sororities heard of this outrage and many young women decided to try the catwalk and test out their outfits . Over and Over . Could a 5 point 6 move up to 7.3 in a low cut blouse and French push 'em up bra ? ( Yes ) . Crowds began forming for this spectacle , and like women auditioning as Rockettes or NFL Cheerleaders , booty was shaken .
The unattractive objected to the uh , objectification . PDUS industries is considering franchising this Nationwide in Public Parks where lawn chairs are allowed . Women will flock to be graded which will in turn bring men to spectate . Think of the T shirt sales alone ! Grand Prize for the women could be an opportunity to pose naked right here in these pages which travel to 20 Countries a day ! Talk about an opportunity for international exposure for those scoring well  in our National competitions ! BTW for those of you scoring at home , ( and lucky you ) , PDUS just wanted to say congratulations .
Absolute furor would erupt if PDUS scorers set up at City Hall for daily evaluations of the Mayor's latest pantsuit  . As w Debbie Wasserman Schultz speculation upon the numbers would be cruel and extreme . How could PDUS not profit from that ?

Saturday, November 22, 2014

All Hail the Junta . Irrelevant Legislators excused

The Birth of the Prepublic of Texas approaches FOTS w the recent demise of our Constitutional Republic .  Treasonous immigration reform becamed a wedge issue for our ' Bronco ' , and he rode it to the death of representative government .

Clint or Shiftless ?
.....or as Michelle Antoinette would call it a Wedgie issue . 
He spanx me...
Belclowning himself after Coronation  Coronas Erkel's outfits got ( and wouldn't you know it ) , progressively more casual ...
First from Imperial Partay........

To Lord of the Treasury..........
Then from Erkel the Fist to a Sad Faced John Wayne Gacey...
Still Saddest of the Sad Faced Clowns ?
Then as a real Card this Joker flushed a bluff and the Country .

We never should have let him use a Teleprompter .

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

.....and forgive them their Trespassing , or not

Obama is announcing his not an Amnesty tomorrow which is expected to regularize 5 M illegals . Rumor has him naming them as free from deportation threat , ( as if they weren't before ) .  Special protections are expected for Parents , as after all , this is for the Children  . Family re-unifications are expected to follow Biden's Bizzarro World plan to fly in Honduran , Guatemalen , and El Salvadoan chirruns , ( to save them from the dangerous trip North ) . Soon the same warm welcome will be available for Mom and Dad as a public service to our Central American friends .

Assurances have been made that these illegals will not be eligible for Obamacare or other Social Services . This is pure Bullshit as all will soon . as a matter of ' fairness ' , be voting and receiving  a Social Security check just like yours . The good deal for them was no tax payments were required at all , except by you

PDUS did some pundering on this and has a response for the Republican Party that should be well accepted . Truly FIERCE E verify is what we have in mind  . Let Obama declare illegals home free while we declare it illegal as hell to pay them ONE SINGLE DIME . His declarations are nothing against rule of law and we have broad support while he does not . Even liberal Oregon rejects Driver's licenses for illegals by 2 to one . Few will welcome illegals or their affiliated costs .  They are being shoved down our throats like Obamacare  .
Why should we forgive their trespassing ?
As w the IRS scandal , and Benghazi , and HCR the enemedia has carried water for ' The Party ' . They do so blatantly w their Gruber denials . ( See below ) . Now they do it w Erkel's Imperial Fiat........
Washington Post penned an editorial opining that Bush did it too w some arcane reference to his administration . Reagan they blamed for Amnesty which they said equaled Erkel's . Fiat has the same validity as signing Simpson Mazzolli by their lights  . ( Democrats would not fund the enforcement end ) .  I switched thru the Alphabets at 6 for their take on legislative irrelevance as proven here . All were preoccupied w NY Snowfall ( in November ! ) and the Bill Cosby rape allegations . Constitutional Governance ? Eh , not so much .
I was expecting a big kaboom !
Did you know Pajama Boy Gruber wrote a comic book explaining Health Care reform that is 150 pages long ?  It starred him as the hero , explaining it all to his dim bulb friends . I bet that will be a hit in Christmas Stockings across the Country . ( In fact I will buy a copy from you , for my brother the Healthcare lobbyist ) .  I am sure its packed w laughs and plenty of slam bam action too .

Monday, November 17, 2014

Angry Obama regrets that thing that happened in your mouth , vows investigation , or the reccurrence of Implausible Deniability

Laughably the President this morning presents and pretends shock on discovering that a man he ' just heard about ' , and " who never worked for this administration " ( except as a lavishly paid consultant ) , believes Americans are waaay stooopid . We of course having seen Obama re-elected , agree .
I looked for 20 minutes and could not find our ' South of I-10 ' column . The gist was that being of average IQ I was smack in the middle of the bell curve .  Driving the freeway one day in the center lane it occurred to me that just as on that Bell curve , everyone to my left , fully 50% of the population , lacked a third IQ digit . All were sadly , under average . Vast societal projects have been attempted to lift those double digiters  beyond their station in life and most of course were colossal failures . As example I again cite Erkel's re-election .We really are a Country of dummies , try as we might to do better , our duhitude overwhelms . For instance we believed Erkel w his HC prevarications , and we believed the shit shoveled by this guy...........
Pajama Boy Gruber noted our vast stupidity in helping Erkel design a fool proof lie that our lesser lights and dimmer bulbs could not illuminate . Both whiz persons , I should have noticed , were to the left of me , where all the double digiters on the Freeway of IQ were traveling .  ( Try this next time your on the freeway , it works ) .
From my POV these guys were going in exactly the wrong direction ! The astonishing thing was realizing that everyone to the left of me on that vast freeway of humanity , was dummer than me . It has proven out time after time . If they were to the right of me they would be going in the right direction instead of the left .
You need reading glasses for the copy above . Go get them .
It's not just R Maddow that could be PJB's twin or TG or something ....
 Oh , the androgyny...........
Of course the bottom line here is our intellectual superiors like Erkel , Pelosi , and Gruber seem to have overlooked all the videotape documenting their widespread and repeated legislative and OFA collusions . Gruber has 6 tapes yucking up American imbecility , w one detailing the accounting stunt forcing the Feds to finance Romney-care to the tune of $400 M . Wouldn't it be fun if we got the last laugh repealing Obamacare ?

Lets do just that .

Friday, November 14, 2014

HRH did not know the Latifahs or Ear Leader

Turkish Nationalists abused American Sailors yesterday transparently parading as anti imperialists instead of Islamic totalitarians . We weren't buying a bit of it .  They took slow mo footage of putting hoods over the heads of our sailors , like they might be heading for a uh , beheading . Twelve were 'detained  ' for about 5 minutes and released without questioning . This is how Turks show the sole of their shoe and their lack of souls .
Not many Americans know the true story of the Turkish Nationalist Mehmet Ali Agha who tried to assassinate Pope John Paul , curiously in 1979 . That was the Iranian hostage year . Remember our Eid or IED series where we noted those merciful pardons granted for Ramadan may well have political purpose ? Same deal here ( or there ) . Several years ago Mohammed Morsi ' escaped ' an Egyptian Prison just as islam hit a crescendo in the neighborhood . In short order friends of the Muslim Brothherhoodies got thousands out in about a dozen countries in  mass ' jailbreaks '  . Hundreds do not escape Prison at one break without massive internal collusion especially in one Country after another . We wagered that those released and those escaped served common purpose . International jihad .
Mehmet Ali Agha ' escaped '  that Turkish Prison in 1979  ( we have heard of those ) . We suspect another islamist let him go . He was to kill the leader of all Christendom , to the great glory of islam . Sirhan Sirhan made a similar attack killing the pending leader of the Free World , of all of Western Civilization . Both like the Lockerbie killer would be heroes in the Caliphate . This is what we face .
 The Press painted Agha as a Right Winger , because of course he was religiously conservative . Nothing could be further from the truth . This Domino player was not one of Ataturk's secularists  . He was jihadi , but we did not know that word yet . We would learn all about it and do not believe the latest Hello Kitty is my Jihad crap . We know what Dar al Harb and Dar al islam mean House of Peace and the House of War.They have started WWIII , and they will lose it .

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

One ambitious American Bald Eagle

Letterman had a Bald Eagle fly in last night and it got me thinking about the first time I saw one . Cannot call the day exactly , maybe Dec 24 or 31  . It was a little chilly w Pea Soup fog , I was playing golf by myself at Gus Wortham Municipal , my home course . There was nobody on the course but me I bet . Walking down the fourth fairway I was smelling the trees . Everything was coated in heavy mist and it was beautiful and just eerily quiet until something caught my ear . Kind of a whoop whoop sound like a UH-1 Huey Helicopter from Vietnam . It was his wings . I wish I had a movie of this but my memory will have to do . I had to think about which direction he was flying and the tape said the same direction I was walking . Its a hunting pattern. Come up directly behind your prey and smack em .
Letterman's Bald Eagle weighed 6 pounds . Dunno about mine but without question this was the largest bird I have ever seen . This Eagle was diving on me I think , like a Stukka on a freight train , only giving up when it noted thru the fog , that I was a lot larger than a beaver .Wadda thrill and I did not have a soul to share it with until today .
 A few inches  L of this  Golfer's club is where our Eagle  fishes the Bayou beneath . ( Yes , this dramatic 400 yd uphill par 4 is also over water , and your typist is one of the few Golfers to score an Eagle two there .That's like an Ace on a longer hole needing 2 shots to reach . Of all the Wold's great  golfers , only Kim Jung Ill could have bested my score  there . Its just too long a hole for ordinary mortals like Bobby Jones who played the course  in 1935 . The vast majority of Eagles BTW , are Aces of 150 yds or less . The man pictured Robert W my golf buddy , found my ball in the cup .
Eagle I
The Bald Eagle is making a magnificent comeback ( even at the threatened GWGC )  . PDUS is thrilled  . We noticed  something James Deanish in that these birds always seem to need a trim . That unkempt shagginess is an American trademark as is our favorite Lab ( seen here on break from the PDUS Chocolate Laboratories ) .
Please note the ragged haircuts below .
They are as shaggy as John Lennon was discordant .
Oh , take a look at the hemline on those clamdiggers too FOTS . They may have inspired the Urbanwear shorts worn 4 inches above the ankle . Its the don't fuck w me I am crazy look .
Bald Eagles are our National symbol because they fear no storm .
Not even radical islam .
Now on to our real subject Veteran's Day ...............

We may be headed back to the Shores of Tripoli FOTS , because Jefferson did not finish the job . The rumblings were first heard in the Carter administration . Sentiments simmered for over a thousand years before that .  The real trouble started after the ayatollah (you so)  released our hostages  .World War III , of corpse , began  on 9 /11 .  Many swam De Nile about that including our leaders . We will of course , never forget  , or forgive either .
President Carter's naivety was unrelated to his lifetime goal of becoming Secretary of  the Navy . I have no doubt he was a fine Sailor . I am proud my Dad was a Naval Captain and my brother was an AF Captain . After an inverted start in fighters he kept a key for a Nuclear Missile . Such a stunningly wonderful hire for that job inspired my faith in Government . To this day I do not know any bad Military Officers . I have heard of bad Cops but for the most part those who serve our country do so w distinction . I include Jimmy Carter who I voted for in 1976 . Liked his wife too who had a quiet dignity the opposite of Queen Mooch . JF Kerry the supposed heroic ( 4 Purple Hearts ) Vietnam Vet is the only disappointment I know of among Officers , altho Gore was no GI Joe either .
 Thank you Vets for your service , even you President Carter . Trusting someone is Human and you made the collassal mistake of trusting a radical islamist who inspired Millions of proxy jihadi Domino Teamsters . Go to GOLDEN CORRAL anyway , and collect your free after 5 vets Buffet . The rest of you guys go too . We encourage such largess for our Veterans and again ask that next time you dine there , that you tell their Manager why you do so .

Tell the the Vets in your life that too .

Monday, November 10, 2014

Who Benefits ?

The President in his role as grievance director for the um , ummah heads to Myanmar tomorrow . Their Rohinga Minority has been tasting their own medicine and find their plans for Burmistan quashed by the Budhist  majority who wish to stay that way .There has been massive illegal immigration there and the Rohinga population boom rivals Houston's Latino explosion .
Let's do an aside about that and then come back . Recriminations from the Democrat's NO-vember are aimed at white women and Hispanics who inexplicably failed to show up and vote Democrat . I had a pretty vanilla comment pulled at the Chronicle by claiming I knew why . It's the same reason Hispanics never have voters equal to our 1 M Latino Citizens in Houston . They know damn well they are illegal and could get in big trouble ( tax and otherwise ) by pushing their luck and (D) button . (heh) .The vast majority of them are wonderful folks even tho half are illegal . Maybe 75% . They know that as does our Amnesty anxious government .
Altho veterans ( column percolating ) may object , were going back to Burma now where their Population Explosion mirrors the Houston Latino rise here , and the National one too . NONE of these guys Rohinga or Latinos have 15 brothers and sisters even tho that's  what many are claiming .  Myanmar is calling bluff on that by demanding Birth Certificates ( and there but for fortune.... ) . Illegals object . Little Jose's parents may well remain in Honduras while little Jose drops a family reunification anchor in America . Lots of our new Citizens are just cousins and neighbors of presiding illegal aliens hungrily sucking our system dry . There are millions of them and we spend 10k a year just to educate them . Double that in benefits .


Not US Citizens or Myanmarians (mmmh , malomars) .
We are just getting invaded by those wanting what we have .

One last thing .

We are betting the conservative Regnery Press did not publish the affectionate memoir of George Bush Sr , written of course by his Junior  ( Of course , why would they ? ) . It is the cover photo that makes us think the Enemdia had a say on the artwork .
See if you don't agree .....

Friday, November 7, 2014

Election illegitimate or Ennuinee swims De Nile

Howdy Mouseketeers . PDUS wishes to thank like minded voters who just delivered a political B slap to Our Ennuinee   unseen since our parents were Mouseketeers themselves . He really deserved one . We found a pertinent quote from NRO's Jonah Goldberg ( down Grrls ) with which to kick off today's festivities . The link is  here .

" If you can’t take some joy, some modicum of relief and mirth, in the unprecedentedly spectacular beclowning of the president, his administration, its enablers, and, to no small degree, liberalism itself, then you need to ask yourself why you’re following politics in the first place. Because, frankly, this has been one of the most enjoyable political moments of my lifetime. I wake up in the morning and rush to find my just-delivered newspaper with a joyful expectation of worsening news so intense, I feel like Morgan Freeman should be narrating my trek to the front lawn. Indeed, not since Dan Rather handcuffed himself to a fraudulent typewriter, hurled it into the abyss, and saw his career plummet like Ted Kennedy was behind the wheel have I enjoyed a story more."
We earned a little celebration FOTS . This has been a hard 6 years . The Mid Terms have at the least been epic for us . Krauthammer called yesterday's the most decisive electoral slap down that we will ever witness , ( and the 2010's were no slouches ) .
Yesterday's Presser for the Preezie was just a pisser .
The President's bemusement amused to no end .
He " really heard " the message from the voters AND his silent majority of those who DID NOT VOTE ( that everything was hunky dory ) .  They want gridlock to end and Republicans and Democrats to ' work together '. Bwahahahaha .   Supposedly since they declined to vote his mandate lives ! ( Reggie , Fri/8) .  Mr President if we may quote your response to our negotiation requests....." you lost " .
 The President comically swimming De Nile about his popularity , has humbled himself w his offer to negotiate positive changes to Obamacare while leaving the bill intact . This reminded us of Saddam's continuing offers to negotiate , first as he was pulled from his canned ham hidey hole , and then later as he tries to play ' Let's Make A Deal ! ' w the fellow fitting his necktie . BTW that final door he opened was a trap . He fell so far and so hard that the rope pulled his head clean off . How fitting that he was beheaded , and hung .
Oh , one more photo from the file , ( and thank you Constance for sending these ) . I had never seen Reagan dressed PDUS style before , but this FOTS , except for the tie , is how I dress most of the time . If I have to leave the house , creased slacks will be substituted . The rest of the time , like President Reagan ( who ALWAYS wore a suit in the oval office ) , I will be dressed casually and comfortably as every man deserves .